pang GIRL
Message: Husbands should be like kleenex: soft, strong, and
disposable. --Madeline Kahn

Being a widow is a matter or life after death- now
that he's dead, I have a life. --Madeline Kahn

Women complain about premenstrual syndrome,
but I think of it as the only time of the month that I
can be myself. --Roseanne

Women should always let men have the last words
of an argument... "Yes Ma'am."

Sure God created man before woman. But then
you always make a rough draft before the final
masterpiece.

A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.

I have a computer, a vibrator, & pizza delivery. Why
should I leave the house?

The fastest way to a man's heart is to saw through
his chest.

Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

A woman's favorite position is CEO.

Women are the only oppressed group in our
society that lives in intimate association with their
opressors. - Evelyn Cunningham

Men forget but never forgive. Women forgive but
never forget.

A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman
through her ears.

became a feminist as an alternative to becoming a
masochist. --Sally Kempton

But if God had wanted us to think just with our
wombs, why did He give us a brain?

If you have a vagina and an attitude in this town,
then that's a lethal combination.
--Sharon Stone

If they can send a man to mars, why can't they
send them all?

If Fe is the chemical symbol for iron, then Female
means 'Iron Male'

What's six inches long and two inches wide and
drives women wild? Money.

I miss my ex-boyfriend a lot. When I finally ran into
him the other day, I backed up and ran into him
again for good measure.

I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.

When women are depressed they either eat or go
shopping. Men invade another country. -Elayne
Boosler-

Behind every successful man is a surprised
woman. -Maryon Pearson-

I never married because there was no need. I have
three pets at home which answer the same
purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls
every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon
and a cat that comes home late at night. -Marie
Corelli-

Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths. -
baroness Edith Summerskill-

If men can run the world, why can't they stop
wearing neckties? how intelligent is it to start the
day by tying a little noose around your neck? -
Linda Ellerbee-

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a
man I keep his house. -Zsa Zsa Gabor-